Post Coital Showering

One day a guy told me he took four showers a day. Now I’m a proponent of cleanliness, but four showers a day seemed excessive. Naturally we went into a discussion of the various reasons why he may shower multiple times a day. I agreed with most, wake up shower, work hard outside freshen up shower, before bedtime shower, but when he threw in the post coitus shower my curiosity was peaked. I get showering before to freshen up, but wouldn’t showering every time you finish a good love-making session ruin the lovely afterglow. This got me to thinking of how that would work in a romance novel.

There are a lot of things about love-making in romance novels that writers have to consider. Will the sex be behind closed doors, or out where the reader can see? If it’s contemporary, do you tackle the pause for condom application or not? Is the sex in your story moving the characters relationship forward, or are you just getting your personal rocks off? But, whether or not your hero or heroine jump up and shower afterward isn’t something I routinely think about. Oftentimes in romance, by the time the two main characters have built up the nerve to finally let their feelings fly they’re bumping and grinding wherever the mood hits them. On a horse, in the desert, on a desk, or maybe they’ve luckily found a bed somewhere. Can you imagine if they had to also consider the location of the nearest shower?

It would be a mood kill if after a hero completed a thorough ravishing of the woman he loves, was to stare into her eyes with wonder—it was the best sex he ever had—and say “That was too hot and sweaty.  I really need to take the shower.” Personally, I’d rather tackle the awkward pre-coital condom application than have my hero and heroine run to bathe off the smell of their lovemaking .

So, while this may work in real life for this particular man who I know—don’t ask why some men reveal their love-making habits to me, I’m often given this info without preamble—it would not be something sexy in a romance novel. Romance is a fantasy world where no one smells bad and the sex is always fabulous. No need to throw in the real life discomfort of post-coital aftereffects.

In case you’re not a fan of Sheldon on the Big Bang Theory: coitus: physical union of male and female genitalia accompanied by rhythmic movements.