Last weekend my husband left me. Yep, packed a bag, got into a van with not one, but twelve other dudes and drove into the night. I didn’t freak out though. He went to New Orleans for his annual man trip. While I did miss him terribly, I was also looking forward to him going. Even though I would be home with our two boys, once they go to bed it mommy’s quiet time with a book and no one to interrupt. Ahh, life’s simple pleasures.
Anyway, it occurred to me that some women–the insecure in my opinion–would be upset about their man leaving them for a weekend. I don’t understand that mentality. In fact, I believe the man trip is one of the three necessary trips every relationship needs.
1. The Man Trip. Needed because it gives your guy that time to laugh with other men as they look (not touch) other women in a safe and secure environment. Watch football, basketball, or whatever sport their little heart desires without hearing us bitch about helping around the house. Talk about the wife, girlfriend, baby momma, etc. with his boys without fear of being overheard and the conversation getting back to friend’s wife, girlfriend, baby momma, etc. Plus, it gives him a chance to miss you. Two plus nights in a room with another dude snoring ain’t got nothing on laying in bed with their lady.
2. The Ladies Trip. This trip is needed because it gives you similar things listed in the man trip. A place to bitch about your husband, boyfriend, baby daddy in a safe secure environment. The ability to discuss makeup, shoes, books and reality television with someone whose eyes don’t glaze over. Eating in new restaurants without kids hanging on you or asking you to take them to potty as soon as your food comes out. A time to get all dressed up and fly looking for no one but yourself and enjoying the cat calls and appreciative glances from the opposite sex. Bonus: holding on to that confident feeling from said cat calls and glances until you get back home to your man.3. And finally: The Family Trip. This may be broken up into two separate trips. One with kids and one without. You need to reconnect with your family regularly. A kid free family trip allows the couple to reconnect, have a conversation without spelling out dirty words for fear of repetition, and reminisce about the days when you had all this free time and money that disappeared the second the doctor said “It’s a boy!” The kid included family trip reminds you why you don’t mind care about loosing the free time and money. It provides memories that will last a lifetime and a tradition that your family looks forward to yearly.
And there you have it. The three–I guess it’s really four–trips every relationship needs. Brought to you by self-proclaimed, but not licensed, relationship expert wannabe Synithia Williams.
Tell me if you agree, or if I left off some benefits.
So true. I still feel guilty whenever I leave the kids with Dad and do something just for me, but I’m working on it. It’s good for everyone.
I think it’s natural for us moms to feel bad about leaving the kids and husbands behind. Even a day trip! The one good thing is that my boys have a lot of extra love for me when I come hom.
I so agree! There’s nothing like a little time apart to help you appreciate each other more! In fact, you never realize how much you appreciate one another until you have to deal with the ‘looks’ (while flattering can get old!) from the opposite sex, or listen to your girls complain about the man in their lives! Coming home to your man takes on a whole new meaning, even when they get on your nerves!
The same goes with planing time to spend with the kids. One of my kids likes to complain that we don’t spend enough time together (he’s 17, go figure), but I stress to him that it’s 7 of us in this house, it’s not always affordable to leave the house to do something fun. So we plan cook outs and board games. This year we took the entire clan to the zoo, packed a lunch and just chilled. It was the best, least expensive thing (we had free tickets!) we’ve done this year and everyone had a blast. Memories like that will last, especially since my son graduates high school this year! Before we know it, we’ll be taking trips without him…*sigh*
I am all for free outings. Movies in the park, kids eat free nights, and even date night at home watching DVDs. The time together is more impotant that how much money is spent.