A few months ago, I blogged about where the idea for the leading man in my novel (currently titled You Can’t Plan Love) came from. Today I’ve decided to let you know where I got the idea for Kenyatta, my heroine.
Contrary to those who know me, Kenyatta is not me. It was easy to put her in a job similar to mine. You know: write what you know. She works for a private environmentally consulting firm. I don’t, but have worked with many consultants in my (gulp) nearly ten years in water quality. But, I digress.
Kenyatta is a woman who’s been hurt in the past. I won’t say how previous lovers hurt her, but I will say she believes men only want her for one thing. Sex.
I don’t think this feeling is new to women in the dating field. Most guys are looking for someone to sleep with, and often we as women too quickly sleep with a man only to realize to late he’s a looser. I’ll blog my thoughts on that another day.
Kenyatta has dated, met losers and believes she’d do better picking a husband based on reason instead of romance. So she agrees to marry a man who looks good on paper, but only later does she realize he’s no good at all.
I completely disagree with my heroine. I don’t believe you can look at a man’s credentials and say “Yep, that’s husband material.” A man’s character is what a woman should consider. I think Kenyatta sold herself short by giving up on finding a good man…luckily I have a romantic heart, invented Malcolm and gave her a reason to hope.
While I cannot dream up a leading man for the other single women I know, I can offer a bit of advice.
Quit with the lists!
Quit saying you’ll only marry a man with this, this, this and this. Really? A woman told me the other day she would only accept a date from a man with a degree. Not one friggin date! I told her to look at the man on the back of the garbage truck. He may treat you like a queen and have a ten inch…(I can’t repeat my exact wording; my mom reads my blog).
Easier said than done you say. When I asked my husband out (yes, I asked him out) he was the exact opposite of guys I used to date. I did that on purpose. If you keep doing, what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got. Getting rid of a list, and opening my heart to someone new, led to a marriage I wouldn’t give up without a fight. Think about it.